Just My Random Thoughts

Thursday, April 26, 2007

FEMALE HEART ATTACKS

Women and heart attacks (Myocardial infarction)

Did you know that women rarely have the same dramatic symptoms that men have when experiencing heart attack...you know, the sudden stabbing pain in the chest, the cold sweat, grabbing the chest and dropping to the floor that we see in the movies. Here is the story of one woman's experience with a heart attack.

"I had a completely unexpected heart attack at about 10:30 PM with NO prior exertion, NO prior emotional trauma that one would suspect might've brought it on. I was sitting all snugly & warm on a cold evening, with my purring cat in my lap, reading an interesting story my friend had sent me, and actually thinking, 'A-A-h, this is the life, all cozy and warm in my soft, cushy Lazy Boy with my feet propped up. ' A moment later, I felt that awful sensation of indigestion, when you've been in a hurry and grabbed a bite of sandwich and washed it down with a dash of water, and that hurried bite seems to feel like you've swallowed a golf ball going down the esophagus in slow motion and it is most uncomfortable. You realize you shouldn't have gulped it down so fast and needed to chew it more thoroughly and this time drink a glass of water to hasten its progress down to the Stomach. This was my initial sensation---the only trouble was that I hadn't taken a bite of anything since about 5:00 p.m.

"After that had seemed to subside, the next sensation was like little squeezing motions that seemed to be racing up my SPINE (hind-sight, it was probably my aorta spasming), gaining speed as they continued racing up and under my sternum (breast bone, where one presses rhythmically when administering CPR). This fascinating process continued on into my throat and branched out into both jaws. AHA!! NOW I stopped puzzling about what was happening--we all have read and/or heard about pain in the jaws being one of the signals of an MI happening, haven't we? I said aloud to myself and the cat, ‘Dear God, I think I'm having a heart attack!’ I lowered the foot rest, dumping the cat from my lap, started to take a step and fell on the floor instead. I thought to myself ‘If this is a heart attack, I shouldn't be walking into the next room where the phone is or anywhere else.......but, on the other hand, if I don't, nobody will know that I need help, and if I wait any longer I may not be able to get up in moment.’

"I pulled myself up with the arms of the chair, walked slowly into the next room and dialed the Paramedics... I told her I thought I was having a heart attack due to the pressure building under the sternum and radiating into my jaws. I didn't feel hysterical or afraid, just stating the facts. She said she was sending the Paramedics over immediately, asked if the front door was near to me, and if so, to unbolt the door and then lie down on the floor where they could see me when they came in.

"I then laid down on the floor as instructed and lost consciousness, as I don't remember the medics coming in, their examination, lifting me onto a gurney or getting me into their ambulance, or hearing the call they made to St. Jude ER on the way, but I did briefly awaken when we arrived and saw that the Cardiologist was already there in his surgical blues and cap, helping the medics pull my stretcher out of the ambulance. He was bending over me asking questions (probably something like 'Have you taken any medications?') but I couldn't make my mind interpret what he was saying, or form an answer, and nodded off again, not waking up until the Cardiologist and partner had already threaded the teeny angiogram balloon up my femoral artery into the aorta and into my heart where they installed 2 side by side stents to hold open my right coronary artery.

"I know it sounds like all my thinking and actions at home must have taken at least 20-30 minutes before calling the Paramedics, but actually it took perhaps 4-5 minutes before the call, and both the fire station and St. Jude are only minutes away from my home, and my Cardiologist was already to go to the OR in his scrubs and get going on restarting my heart (which had stopped somewhere between my arrival and the procedure) and installing the stents.

"Why have I written all of this to you with so much detail? Because I want all of you who are so important in my life to know what I learned first hand."

1. Be aware that something very different is happening in your body not the usual men's symptoms, but inexplicable things happening (until my sternum and jaws got into the act ). It is said that many more women than men die of their first (and last) MI because they didn't know they were having one, and commonly mistake it as indigestion, take some Maalox or other anti-heartburn preparation, and go to bed, hoping they'll feel better in the morning when they wake up....which doesn't happen. My female friends, your symptoms might not be exactly like mine, so I advise you to call the Paramedics if ANYTHING is unpleasantly happening that you've not felt before. It is better to have a "false alarm" visitation than to risk your life guessing what it might be!

2. Note that I said "Call the Paramedics". Ladies, TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE! Do NOT try to drive yourself to the ER--you're a hazard to others on the road, and so is your panicked husband who will be speeding and looking anxiously at what's happening with you instead of the road. Do NOT call your doctor--he doesn't know where you live and if it's at night you won't reach him anyway, and if it's daytime, his assistants (or answering service) will tell you to call the Paramedics. He doesn't carry the equipment in his car that you need to be saved! The Paramedics do, principally OXYGEN that you need ASAP. Your Dr. will be notified later.

3. Don't assume it couldn't be a heart attack because you have a normal cholesterol count. Research has discovered that a cholesterol elevated reading is rarely the cause of an MI (unless it's unbelievably high, and/or accompanied by high blood pressure.) MIs are usually caused by long-term stress and inflammation in the body, which dumps all sorts of deadly hormones into your system to sludge things up in there. Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep. Let's be careful and be aware. The more we know, the better chance we could survive.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Redneck Cruise Lines

As we were driving home from our cruise, we stopped at Cracker Barrel. I started wondering what they would serve in the dining room on a redneck cruise ship. The Redneck Cruise Lines sort of took off. Here's what I've decided so far.

The ship would be shaped like a giant bass boat and decorated with assorted stuffed roadkill (the roadkill itself having been added to the dinner menu.)

The bathrooms would have half moons cut in the doors and seats on wooden shelves over the toilets.

Instead of a blue tile swimming pool, there'd be a muddy brown cement pond with a rope dangling over it instead of a water slide.

The hairy chest contest would include female contestants.

The hot tubs would be barrels over open fires with trawling motors to move the water.

One of the onboard activities would be a scavenger hunt to find the still. The winner gets a one-year supply of duty-free moonshine.

The kids would have a still building contest.

Instead of formal dress nights, we'd have formal camo nights.

Other activities:
sea gull hunting
duck blind design contest
deer stand climbing contest
shotgun shell repacking contest
chumming the water for sharks
creative uses for fireworks demonstration

In the dining room:
the aforementioned roadkill
fried chicken
fried catfish
fried okra
crawdads
grits
hominy
pork rinds
pickled eggs

From Matt:

"double-wide" cruise ship

Doesn't the Scarlett O'Hara and Stone Mountain Lake count? Are there duck blinds instead of hot tubs? Line dancing? Mechanical bull? Inner-tube life rafts. NASCAR themed staterooms like the "Tony Stewart Suite" sponsored by The Home Depot. The HoneymoonSuite sponsored by the Number 6 Viagra Team... Fried Okra Fridays. TheCrawfish Cruise benefitting Katrina victims, of course... What are theports of call? Panama City Beach? Mobile? Galveston? South Padre Island?Pascagoula?? And for the high rollers... Biloxi !!

Thursday, April 12, 2007

I love it.

A chocolate company is buying a baby food company. It's about time they gave those rugrats some antioxidants.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Urine Test

Like a lot of folks in this state, I have a job. I work, they pay me. I pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as they see fit. In order to get that paycheck I am required to pass a random urine test, which I have no problem with.

What I do have a problem with is the distribution of my taxes to people who don't have to pass a urine test. Shouldn't one have to pass a urine test to get a welfare check, because I have to pass one to earn it for them?

Please understand, I have no problem with helping people get back on their feet. I do, on the other hand, have a problem with helping someone sit on their tush. Could you imagine how much money the state would save if people had to pass a urine test to get a public assistance check?

Quick post on our cruise

This should give you an idea of how the week went.

Just as the ship started to pull away from the pier, I saw movement at near the back of the boat - a couple of dolphins were playing in the harbor!

As we moved down the channel there was more activity off to the side. At first I thought it was the dolphins again, but there were no dorsal fins. This time it was at least one manatee.

Just as we reached open water, I saw a bird acting like it was trying unsuccessfully to catch a fish with its talons. As we floated by I saw it was trying to land --- on the back of a large sea turtle.

And that was just the first hour.