Redneck Cruise Lines

As we were driving home from our cruise, we stopped at Cracker Barrel. I started wondering what they would serve in the dining room on a redneck cruise ship. The Redneck Cruise Lines sort of took off. Here's what I've decided so far.

The ship would be shaped like a giant bass boat and decorated with assorted stuffed roadkill (the roadkill itself having been added to the dinner menu.)

The bathrooms would have half moons cut in the doors and seats on wooden shelves over the toilets.

Instead of a blue tile swimming pool, there'd be a muddy brown cement pond with a rope dangling over it instead of a water slide.

The hairy chest contest would include female contestants.

The hot tubs would be barrels over open fires with trawling motors to move the water.

One of the onboard activities would be a scavenger hunt to find the still. The winner gets a one-year supply of duty-free moonshine.

The kids would have a still building contest.

Instead of formal dress nights, we'd have formal camo nights.

Other activities:
sea gull hunting
duck blind design contest
deer stand climbing contest
shotgun shell repacking contest
chumming the water for sharks
creative uses for fireworks demonstration

In the dining room:
the aforementioned roadkill
fried chicken
fried catfish
fried okra
crawdads
grits
hominy
pork rinds
pickled eggs

From Matt:

"double-wide" cruise ship

Doesn't the Scarlett O'Hara and Stone Mountain Lake count? Are there duck blinds instead of hot tubs? Line dancing? Mechanical bull? Inner-tube life rafts. NASCAR themed staterooms like the "Tony Stewart Suite" sponsored by The Home Depot. The HoneymoonSuite sponsored by the Number 6 Viagra Team... Fried Okra Fridays. TheCrawfish Cruise benefitting Katrina victims, of course... What are theports of call? Panama City Beach? Mobile? Galveston? South Padre Island?Pascagoula?? And for the high rollers... Biloxi !!